Saturday, December 13, 2008

Gross or Not Gross?

Today I decided that I NEEDED to vacuum the nasty carpet! I know... you're all shocked! When on Earth have I actually vacuumed on "awesome housekeeper's" off week? Well, the kids did a totally superior job in trashing the place after housekeeper left.... but that's another blog entry entirely. So I am vacuuming... And I decide that if I'm going to make this very rare effort, I might as well give it my all. So I MOVED the furniture and everything. This was not just your everyday vacuum job... this was "super-mom-discovers-she-actually-owns-a-vacuum-and-must-find-out-how-this-strange-contraption-works!" Anyway... as I move the coffee table, we learn that a cookie has been living under there for... well... a very long time. Who really knows how long. So, as I'm vacuuming I say to Dewey, "Hey Baby, can you get that cookie and...." (I have to pause mid-sentence, because before I can say, "throw it in the trash"... the cookie is gone and "icky-boy" is happily chewing really old... most likely very stale... possibly moldy... disgusting cookie!") So I would call that "GROSS". But that got me thinking... my kids and I have very different ideas of what is and is not gross. Here is a sample of what my precious boys believe to be gross or not gross.

Roast Chicken and Mashed Potatoes: Gross
McDonald's Chicken Nuggets: Not Gross

Mozzarella, Provolone, Swiss or any other
"non-orange" cheese: Really Gross
Nasty processed American "Squirt Cheese" in a can
: Not Gross.

Spaghetti Sauce: TOTALLY Nasty Gross
Boogers (old or new, wet or dry, any color): Not Gross. Quite tasty, in fact!

Steak: Gross, gross, gross, gross!
Old french fries under the car seat: Deliciously non-gross

Scrambled eggs: So gross they are horrified at the thought.
Finger painting with poop: A totally cool form of artistic expression... oh.. and very NON gross!

I could go on and on... but I think the point is clear. I live in bizzaro world. What I believe to be disgusting is actually very, very cool! So I've decided to re-think how I approach dinner time. Perhaps a steaming plate of.... oh never mind... That's just entirely too gross to even type! :o)

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